When Bears Attack!
by CoRsAiR1
Summary: PG13 for blood and violence. When Mario and his SSB friends go hiking in the mountains, Luigi finds a bear! And the chase begins. Part 3 is up!
1. Default Chapter

When BEARS attack!  
  
Disclaimer: I do ot own any of the characters included in this story, they are property of Nintendo.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
One day Mario, Luigi, Captain Falcon, Peach and DK were hiking in the mountains. As they traveled on, Luigi went over to some bushes to ditch his emtpy pop can. He did just that and went on with the group. Suddenly a giant hairy thing emerged from the bushes.  
  
Luigi: Uh.. Mario, what is that?  
  
Mario: Huh what? Oh crap a bear, run!  
  
The group turned and ran. The bear chased them for a long time until they reached a cave.  
  
Peach: We should be safe here. So they walked farther into the cave, until the reached the end. It was dark and Captain F. decided to sit down. He sat on the first thing he touched which was a large hairy, bulky, pillow.  
  
Mario: Geez its dark in here, let me light a match.  
  
Mario lit a match to reveal the cave was full of sleeping.....BEARS!  
  
CF: Bears ahhhhh!!!!!!  
  
Mario: Idiot, you woke them up! Run!  
  
The gang ran out of the cave and straight forward without looking. They accidentally ran off a steep cliff.  
  
DK: Oh nuts! we'll probably break a few arms and legs when were done falling.  
  
They fell for about 30 seconds until they hit rocks.  
  
Mario: Ouch my leg!  
  
Luigi: Crap, my back is out!  
  
Peach: I think my foot is broken.  
  
DK: Magicaly appears in body cast.  
  
CF: My legs are gone!  
  
Writer: Well I could let you all sit here immobile, but that would mean no more story so I will magicaly fix all your bones!  
  
All: Thanks!  
  
They all looked up at the top of the cliff to see the bears had somehow aquired parachutes, and were sailing towards them.  
  
Mario: Run!  
  
They ran on, but CF suddenly stopped.  
  
CF: I broke a nail!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!  
  
The bears caught up to CF and mangled him!  
  
CF: Ahh help!  
  
Blood spurted from the spot where the bears gathered.  
  
Luigi: Oh well he played no really important role in this story.  
  
Mario: Yeah that should slow them down!  
  
They kept on running until they met a fork in the trail.  
  
Mario: I say we go left!  
  
Luigi: I say we go right!  
  
Mario: Hey you have to listen to me! I am the star and leader in all these stories!  
  
Writer: Says who?  
  
Mario: Me!  
  
Well this story has been good without your crummy accent, so I hereby grant you the authorities of a leader!  
  
Mario: Thanks!  
  
The group ran to the left trail and kept on going.  
  
DK: I think we ditched those bears.  
  
But DK had spoke too soon, a group of bears came out of the bushes from behind him and mauled his body!  
  
DK: Ahh! help me!  
  
DK Gurgled blood as the bears vicously tore off his arms and legs!  
  
DK was almost dead, as a bear oproached his head and put it in his jaws.  
  
DK: Ahhhhhh.........  
  
The bear tore off his head blood flew in every direction.  
  
Luigi: Sick!  
  
Mario: Ditto!  
  
The bears finished eating DK's carcass and began to chase the group again.  
  
Mario: Will this ever end?  
  
Writer: Probably not, considering I find great humor in watching you all get chased and mauled.  
  
Mario: Whats this world coming to when writers find humor in characters dieing?  
  
Writer: Well I could make you all go to a SSBM stage so you can fight the bears?  
  
Mario: Anything is better than this!  
  
Writer:Alright!  
  
The group+the bears get transported to the "Final Destination" stage to do battle.  
  
Writer: Mario, Luigi, and Peach Versus The Bears!  
  
Who will win? You can decide in your review! Part two will be posted soon. 


	2. Battle With The Bears!

Part Two: " When Bears And Smashers Fight!  
  
  
  
The groups appeared on the " Final Destination" stage to do battle.  
  
Writer: Here are the rules: Only 1 live per person and bear. The only item avaliable will be the beam sword.  
  
All: Right!  
  
Bears: ROAR!!!(Right!)  
  
Writer: Ready...Smash!  
  
The fight began with the humans on the left and the bears on the right. The humans all jumped towards the grouped bears. Mario used his down kick on one the front bear. Then the two back bears attacked Mario with the "Bear Claw" attack, which sent him flying behind the other two humans. Luigi and Peach got right in front of the group and performed there smash attacks, fully charged! This sent the bears flying, and Mario had just gotten back up and joined the others. All 3 of the bears used the "Bear Balloon", which inflated them and floated them back to the stage. Peach jumped back from Mario and Luigi, and the two brothers began to use their fireballs on the bears. The bears broke through the barrage, and all 3 used bear claw on Luigi, which sent him flying off stage. Luigi then used his up+b move to gain air, and get back into the fray.  
  
The 3 bears grouped up and used their best attack, the devastating " Bear Sit" attack. The 3 sat on Mario who puked. His face turned red and exploded, sending blood everywhere! Peach jumped back into the fight and used her +b move to send one bear flying off stage, he easily got back on with bear balloon. Luigi grouped back up with Peach and they charged smash attacks. The bears got closer to their attacks, but not close enough. Peach and Luigi were forced to unleash their attacks on thin air, and the bears all used bear claw on Luigi. He was sent flying off the the left of the stage and didn't make it back. Now it was 3 on one as the bears closed in on Peach. Peach whipped out her golf club and her frying pan and began to slowly walk back from the 3.  
  
Peach: Back I say!  
  
She swung them franticaly as to shoo them away. The bears advanced and and charged at Peach. They knocked her to the ground and used the "EAT" attack. They ripped her up as she screamed, and tore off her head. The stage was covered in blood. The bears celebrated their victory with their finishing pose. They standed up back to back and whipped out some beer. They drank it all in 2 seconds flat, and put on some sunglasses, crossed their arms, and gave a wicked smile.  
  
Writer that was entertaining, so I shall revive all of you.  
  
The 3 humans were revived, and taken back to the real world.  
  
Mario: Mama mia! Those bears were heavy!  
  
Peach: Yes and they hurt me!  
  
Luigi: Stop complaining! It was only a regular match!  
  
Writer: Oh I would be complaining if I were you Luigi. It says here you made a bet with Wario that you would lose a single match for 2 months straight! According to this paper its only been a month. Lets see you owe him 2,000,000 dollars!  
  
Luigi: Yeah so? I can pay him later.  
  
Writer: Well its your choice. Anyway I'm getting bored, I think I'll make those bears come back.  
  
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Writer: Hey I call the shots here, and I say they come back!  
  
The bears emerged out of thin air and began to chase the group.  
  
All: RUN!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
The bears gave chase and the group ran back to Mario's car. They drove off just escaping the bears.  
  
Mario: We need a video camera! We'll make more off this than my upcoming game!  
  
Luigi: Yeah! We can call it "When Bears Attack!"  
  
Peach: Sounds good to me!  
  
Mario: We'll need to be properly equipped!  
  
Will the 3 find fortune in the Animal Video business? Or will they just get eaten? Part 3 will come soon. 


	3. Money or Munchies?

Part 3: "Money or Munchies"?  
  
Mario, Peach and Luigi drove back to Mario's house to grab his video camera.  
  
Mario: Here I'll get some fresh film.  
  
Peach: Luigi, call Jack Hanna, and the Crocodile hunter, we'll need their expertise on this adventure!  
  
Luigi: Why the Crocodile Hunter? Doesn't he deal in crocodiles?  
  
Peach: Uh....Yeah, I guess so, but if he's in our movie it it will make it look better!  
  
Luigi: Uh, ok whatever.  
  
So Luigi phoned Jack Hanna and the Crocodile hunter. They agreed to come along.......... after Luigi offered an inviting sum of payment. When they arrived they all hopped in Mario's car and got going.  
  
When they were near the mountain Luigi began the tape.  
  
Luigi: Hello! Were here with Jack Hanna animal expert, and the Crocodile Hunter! They will be joining us as we venture off on an exciting journey, to show you the worlds most vicious animal..... the bear!  
  
After about 10 minutes of babble and nonsense about a bears lifestyle and habitat, the group reached the mountain path.  
  
Luigi: Ok here we are at the mountain path! The home of the dangerous and vicious beasts!  
  
Luigi: Were walking up the path now, listening for any sound of a bear.  
  
Jack Hanna: If a bear comes into range, you must be very quiet as it will attack if frightened.  
  
Crocodile Hunter: Then if the bear does attack, it opens it's huge jaws!  
  
Luigi and co. continue to walk up the path talking into the camera about how a bear will attack if threatened. Then Mario found what looked like a bear den.  
  
Luigi: We've found one! We are looking at a real bear's den!  
  
JH: Yes and if we go inside now we will most likely find a bear sleeping, or a mother tending to its cubs.  
  
CH: Yes and the cubs have small jaws, but are still capable off immense crushing power!  
  
Luigi: We are advancing into the cave now, and there they are!  
  
Luigi pointed to a group of cubs and mother bears.  
  
JH: Now if woken up and threatened the cubs will flee to their mother, who will attack viciously at whoever frightened her young.  
  
The Crocodile Hunter stupidly woke up the bears with his hand, and attempted to show the camera a bears jaws. The mother mauled the Crocodile Hunter and ate his head whole.  
  
Crodile Hunters Head: Well here I am in the bears stomach, a huge place!  
  
Mario: Run!!!  
  
There was 3 mother bears who all began to chase the group.  
  
The cubs ate the CH's remains.  
  
Luigi: We are running away from some real live bears!  
  
Mario: Luigi! Forget the video run! These beasts will kill us!  
  
Luigi: Right!  
  
Luigi stopped talking into the camera, but still pointed it at the chasing bears.  
  
Luigi: What pays more? Horror films or Animal attack videos?  
  
Mario: Not sure, we'll have to ask someone who knows back home!  
  
Luigi: If we live to return home!  
  
The group ran as fast as they could, but JH slipped on a rock.  
  
He tried to get up, and almost succeeded, but before he could run again one of the mother bears jumped onto his back and sunk her jaws into his neck, crushing it.  
  
Luigi: Darn! Now their both dead!  
  
Peach: Well at least we dont have to pay that large sum of cash!  
  
Mario: Yeah!  
  
Luigi: Peach give me your cell phone!  
  
Peach: Here you go!  
  
Luigi phoned the other smashers and asked for help.  
  
Luigi: Send whoever can come to the north mountain! We are gonna die!  
  
Fox: Right!  
  
Luigi: Ended the call and gave the phone back to Peach.  
  
Luigi: Help is on the way.  
  
They continued to run, until they reached Mario's car. They hopped in and began to drive off, But the bears got in the way and stopped them. They crushed the car and the 3 jumped out just in time.  
  
Mario:Run to that cave!  
  
They ran into the cave, and luckily, it was abandoned.  
  
The bears ran past, and the 3 got out after about 5 minutes of waiting.  
  
Mario: I would say I think we ditched them, but last time that happened DK got eaten.  
  
Luigi: Look!  
  
Luigi pointed to the bushes, where about 20 bears were coming out. They made a circle around the 3.  
  
Peach: No were dead!  
  
Then suddenly, a helicopter came out of the sky. It got in the middle of the circle and ropes came out.  
  
Link, Ness, Fox, Falco, and Zelda came down and joined the 3.  
  
The helicopter flew away and landed nearby.  
  
Mario: Man are we glad to see you guys!  
  
Luigi: Yeah!  
  
The bears got closer and closer. The group was still outnumbered.  
  
Mario: Where is everyone else?  
  
Fox: They are on vacation.  
  
Luigi: Oh crap!  
  
Peach:No I'm too rich to die!  
  
Will the smashers be killed? And if they live, will the video tape be worth enough for the trouble? Find out in part 4: "When Bears Attack, And Smashers Retaliate!" 


End file.
